There is a weight.

I have never birthed a child, but there are plenty of students that call me mom for one reason or another. People come to me with advice because they see me as a “mom away from mom.” And there is an immense weight to that situation because I would never want to steer someone else’s child wrong because they are not my actual baby. I am not their mother, but I am someone who helps. I think about my mom and how she would always help me through the good times and the bad. She would give me these little nuggets of wisdom that only she could come up with. I have held those nuggets with me for my whole life and I want to be able to pass them down to my students.  I want to be like her to my students because I do not have a child of my own.

There’s a bond between a child and their mother, and I want to foster that bond with my students. When students come to me and calls me mom and asks for assistance or advice, there is a weight to that, because I think about my mom. I always want kids to see their potential and be the best they can be. There are some kids who just do not have a personal cheerleader, and that is where I come in.

But there are times when I just can’t be mom.

I have a rule. Whatever happens in room 141 stays in room 141, with one exception. If you are hurting yourself, you are hurt or someone is hurting you, that is where I have to become more of a teacher. My mom hat has to come off. I have to report things like that because I may not always have the solution or the answer, and there are people for that. I always try to get them help on the down-low because I never want to out them and cause more hurt. I am the person who you can come to talk to about it in a person-to-person manner. And I will always be here for anyone who is hurting or being hurt because I see that as part of my responsibility.

There is a family.

I have been teaching for a long time, since 1996 in fact. Is still get calls and Facebook messages from students I haven’t had in class for years. I had a kid who I taught at Zion Benton High School just message me and say, “Mom, I have questions cause I am not happy with what I’m doing and what I am majoring in in college,” and I discussed it with him and tried to get him to a better place. It has always been my joke that once you are one of my kids, you are always one of my kids. I never claim to be someone’s mom, but there is a bond that I get with kids, and I try to foster that bond always. I will still have kids who will send me baby photos because they see me as part of their family, and so do I.

There is no cost.

I taught a kid who never really had much. He was my right-hand man and someone who I saw as part of my family. During his senior year, he got a scholarship to go to college, but he needed all the other essentials for his college life, like a microwave and bedding. His mom had issues with drugs and his father was not around, so he never had money to spend. A few other teachers and I took him out and bought him all the essentials. He now works in Gurnee, and if someone goes to his store from Antioch, he always asks, “Do you know my momma Teddy?” If they do, he gives them discounts because I took care of him. I have students who may not have enough money at home to buy a lunch at school, so I keep snacks in my room. There is no cost when it comes to my students. It also isn’t charity because I do not see them as needy people, I see them as my kids who need help.

The kids I come into contact with through school are not just my students. They are not just my cast. They are not just my helpers.

They are more.

They are my family.