For some, Feb. 14 is the most sinister day of the year. If the thought of cute couples kissing in the hallways makes you want to puke, this post is for you. This holiday, once the commemoration of the life of a man dedicated to performing forbidden marriages, has come far from it’s celebratory feast origins, and now stands for overpriced candies, overcommercialized cards and overwhelming public displays of affection. Even though the sight of giant stuffed bears and sappy roses-are-red poems make you a little sick to your stomach, you can’t help but feel slightly lonely being alone while surrounded by couples on Valentine’s day. Just look on Facebook at all the people complaining and being driven insane laying claim to forever alone and putting down statuses like no one will ever love them. If you’re caught without a Valentine this Friday, don’t fret. Take this chance instead to love yourself.
If at first you’re lonely, just wait. If you’ve not been alone that often, or if when you were you weren’t comfortable with it, be patient. It’s fine to be alone once you’re embracing it. There’s no shame in buying yourself flowers, because once you have brought springtime to your room you are soon transformed when the scent has diffused. On Valentine’s Day you can haunt the acceptable places, your bedroom, the coffee shop, the library. You can sit and read at a cafe, get your caffeine fix and stay. You can browse the stacks and smell the books. Stay late into the night and lose yourself in someone else’s life. Strike up a conversation with someone you’ve never met. You’d be surprised how many people find themselves in those same places.
Take yourself out for dinner, to a restaurant with tablecloths, linen and silverware. You’re no less intriguing of a person when you’re eating dessert alone and cleaning the whipped cream from the dish with your finger. To be honest, some couples at full tables will probably wish they were where you were. Rather than dressing to impress wear your colors because you love the way you look, and that’s really the only opinion that matters.
Go to the movies, where it is dark and soothing. Find a seat alone amidst a flocking community. Order an extra large popcorn and eat the entire thing yourself. Plug in your headphones as you walk to your car. Stand on the outside of the door until the music convinces you more and more to dance like no one’s watching. And if they are, assume it is with best intentions, because the way a confident body moves is entrancing and effective.
Take the money you would be spending on expensive gifts that are presently forgotten and instead buy yourself an entire box of chocolates and relish the fact that you don’t have to share. Spend time talking to your animals. They don’t need a Hallmark card and $60 necklace to love you every day of the year.
Society is fearful of being alone, like people must have problems if after a while nobody is dating them, or if you’re alone you must be wasting away in a basement. But being alone can mean freedom if you make it. If you still feel so lonely when you are alone, remember, you can be surrounded in an instant if you need it. If your heart is aching, make the best of it.
